Star wars for silly people
by Funky Munky1
Summary: Star wars characters gone all wacky. Chock full of more strangeness and pop culture refrences then the entire last season of Late night with Conan O Brian. Rated PG-13 for chapter 4.
1. Luke is confused

This is mine. ALL MINE. ITS all mine. I OWN IT ALL! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! Ooh a muffin.  
  
LUKE LEARNS A LOT  
  
  
  
(There are many pointless pop culture refrences.  
Reader Discretion advised.)  
Luke was having a good time fixing a moisture vapirator when a jawa approached  
him. "Seena ohba nakanis" it said. "What?" said Luke. The jawa left muttering   
obscenitys. "That was strange" luke said. Then he was run over by a landspeeder.  
The Jawa had tried to warn him but Luke just said "What?" Theres a lesson here.  
In fact if you look hard enough I bet you could see this as a metaphor for world  
war 2. But to be honest I didn't intend any symbolism. I just wanted Luke to be run  
over. Han Solo is cooler anyway.  
  
  
  
  
More to come... Unless I die of course. That'd just be weird. 


	2. Jabba makes an emotional breakthrough

Here it is back by popular demand!  
The fic that 9 out of ten dentists reccomend!  
!!!STAR WARS FOR SILLY PEOPLE!!!  
(Sponsored by Frodo Baggins and Cher)  
  
Jabba was sitting in his palace with princess  
Leia chained to him. He was sad. "I'm so sad!"  
he said. "Why are you sad?" ask Leia. "I feel  
so bloated and fat!" sobbed Jabba "Your not that   
fat!" said Leia. "Really?" asked Jabba. "Yeah I  
like you just the way you are!" insisted Leia.  
"You do?" asked Jabba. "No." Leia replied. She  
then choked him to death with the chain. 


	3. Enter Rocky Theme

Here it is once again! The fic That Tipper Gore says is  
packed with Satanic messages if you read it backwords!  
STAR WARS FOR SILLY PEOPLE  
  
Yoda was going to was going to wake up Luke to get started training.   
Then he had a thought. Maybe Luke should train with the Rocky theme   
song in the background. So Luke did and went on to beat Darth Vader   
in the 12th round by a knockout.  
  
  
  
  
Authors Note: If Darth Vader were half as tough as Mr. T he would of   
crushed the Rebellion. 


	4. A side of Yoda never seen before

And now for the next chapter of the fic you all love. The fic that Katrea says  
is more pointless than the green bananas joke! (Check Reviews. I'm not lying.)  
  
Star Wars For silly people!!!  
  
Luke was depressed. After the releases of Star Wars: Episode 1 and the gawd awful  
(notice I spell god "gawd". Its for extra emphisis.) Episode 2 Luke was losing   
popularity. When "A New Hope" came out no kid in his right mind would be caught   
dead saying "I get to be Obi-Wan!" when it came time to play Star Wars. But now   
all anyone talked about is Anakin this and Obi-Wan that. This was a huge blow to   
Lukes ego. So he decided to go to Yoda for advice.  
  
"Beaten their popularity can be. Become hipper than them you must." said wise old  
Yoda. "But how? How can I beat them? Their action figures are much cooler than mine!"  
inquired Luke. "Become Hip-Hop master you must. Mad tracks you must lay down." replyed  
Yoda. This surprised Luke. "I didn't know you knew about Hip-Hop." said a very confused   
Luke. "Oh yes back in the day down with the homies I was." replied Yoda Bitches I did   
smack up! Bling bling I did sport! Forties I did ch-" Luke interupted "Uh okay thanks  
for the advice!" Than he ran away from Yoda as fast as his Jedi legs could take him.  
"Run off they always do. Why I wonder?" thought Yoda. "Oh well" he said out loud. Then  
he put on a green fur coat, a hat with a feather in it, and replaced his wooden cane   
with a gold one. "Get me some ass I must." said Yoda the pimp. (Come on don't be   
surprised. You knew the first time you saw Yoda he was a playah. Thats right I spelt   
player with an "ah". Deal with it Yo.)  
  
Despite his sudden fear of his 2 foot tall teacher, Luke saw some wisdom in his grammaticly  
incorrect words. A rapper eh.......  
  
  
This is the first story in this fic that will have a 2nd part.  
As for the whole Yoda thing I appologize. It seemed like a good  
idea at the time. Yo. 


	5. Commercial for Stormtrooper Armor

The conclusion to Lukes problem will be coming up later   
but first a commercial from our Demented sponsors...  
  
(Title flys on screen.)  
  
Screen: NEW AND IMPROVED!  
  
(Announcers voice comes on.)  
  
Announcer: What was the problem with all those other brands  
  
of Stormtrooper armor?  
  
(Cut to stormtrooper sitting in Mos Eisley.)  
  
Stormtrooper: They don't do nothin'! I get shot and they don't  
  
protect me!  
  
(Stormtrooper gets shot.)  
  
Stormtrooper: Ow my thigh!  
  
(Stormtrooper falls over)  
  
Announcer: But Capt. Corellia brand is much, much, better! Why  
  
just ask what this guy we paid had to say.  
  
(Boba Fett appears on screen)  
  
Boba Fett: (Unenthusiasticly) *sigh* It is the best armor out   
  
there. (Under his breath) I can't belive I agrred to this.  
  
Announcer: See! Even intergalactic bounty hunters agree,   
  
you just can't beat Capt. Corellia brand armor!  
  
(Cut to stormtrooper in Mos Eisley.)  
  
Stormtrooper: Thanks Capt. Corellia brand! You turned my armor problem  
  
around 360 degrees!  
  
(Stormtrooper gets shot)  
  
Stormtrooper: Ow my thigh!  
  
(Stormtrooper falls over)  
  
  
This is my response to the fact that stormtroopers wear bulky armor for no  
friggin reason! I promise the conclusion to Lukes problem is coming up. Or  
is it? Mwuahahahahahahaha!!!! ...Yes it is. 


End file.
